A Tale of Two Lengths

‘Shoddyline’. ‘Wide They Bother’. England’s woeful direction has already been a cause for rejoicing among tabloid headline writers. But the Gabba Test is also beginning to look a little like a tale of two lengths: England’s too predictably short, Australia’s suitably generous.

This was especially obvious in the afternoon, as Australia’s tail failed to expire of its own accord, the last three wickets spacing themselves over 133 runs. Glenn McGrath’s batting doesn’t usually tell a lengthy tale, but one ball in Steve Harmison’s 29th over yesterday told at least a little one. So predictable had Harmison’s intent become that Australia’s last man slid into position to play a hook before the ball was bowled; he shovelled it, inelegantly but effectively, to fine leg for a single.

In the Gabba Test of the 1974-5 Ashes – the series that is remembered as the harbinger of the era of epic fast bowling – Dennis Lillee was incandescent with rage when bowled a bouncer by Tony Greig, from which he was caught behind. He claimed it as a cassus belli for the bouncers he and Thomson sent England’s way; in reality, it was more a case of getting one’s retaliation in first.

England’s short bowling at the Australian tail on this occasion, however, showed both how familiar and how futile this tactic has become: the likes of Lee, Warne and Clark, heavily helmeted, comfortably upholstered, are not so easily intimidated. Alternatives were laid to one side. The yorker, standard issue in one-day cricket, was nowhere to be seen. The ball, having shown signs of swinging after 130 overs, was pounded in mindlessly short. As Lee and Clark laid about them in every direction, adding 50 in 44 balls, Flintoff seemed for the only time in the innings to lose his way as captain, scattering seven men to the boundary. Anderson certainly lost his way as a bowler, leaving Clark too much room to swing his arms; Clark carved him for consecutive, impudent sixes. The only chance the attack generated, to Cook at backward square leg, predictably went down, amid howls of execration.

With equal predictability, Ponting called his men in, denying England the meagre satisfaction of finishing Australia’s innings themselves, and testing the legs of a top order in the field for 155 overs. The same scheme worked for Ian Johnson when he declared at 8 for 601 here fifty-two years ago: England were swiftly four for 25. It did the job here too: Strauss’s miscued hook looked a weary shot. McGrath and his mimic Clark had batsmen caught in the cordon within five overs – the same achievement took England almost 142. Two lengths again: Australia look like making short work of England; England will benefit from a lengthy reflection on their efforts.