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An overpowering bleakness

Talking about cricket feels out of place in the face of the Mumbai attacks

Sambit Bal

November 28, 2008

Comments: 81 | Text size: A | A


The Taj: not merely a hotel, a symbol of Mumbai's identity © Getty Images
 

Cricket feels so trivial, so utterly irrelevant now. I have sat for nearly 24 hours before the TV, watching the world's most resilient city in the thrall of a terrifying and seemingly never-ending siege. Watching the Taj Mahal hotel burn for two days has felt like living through Mumbai's own 9/11, for the Taj is not merely a five-star hotel, it is a symbol of the city's identity, an iconic link between its rich past and bustling present.

I have watched a city of a million dreams held hostage by 20 or so men who have purged from their souls every trace of humanity - let's not confer on them the dignity of a religion - and I have felt the blood drain out of me.

I have felt a sense of paralysis and rage. My family and I are safe at home, none of my friends were in the hotels or at the other attack sites; but I am numb, not with fear or personal loss, but something far deeper: a sense of overpowering bleakness.

Through the day I have had a job to do. Mumbai's tragedy has brought serious implications for cricket, and I have spent my time also following the discussions between the cricket boards of India, England and Australia; chatting with colleagues in Brisbane, London and Bangalore; calling English journalists for updates; deciding headlines and story angles. Never has my job felt like such a chore, so meaningless and futile. Rarely have I been as distracted or conflicted.

That England shouldn't play the next two one-dayers should have been a no-brainer. Middlesex and Western Australia needn't have bothered making explanations. Sport is not bigger than life, not even in a country where it is said to be the religion.

I should perhaps be writing a piece assessing the impact of the terrorist attack on Indian cricket, and consequently on the global cricket ecosystem. But I can't bring myself to. I feel compelled, instead, to write this. I am not sure if Cricinfo has any use for this. I will let my colleagues make the call. It's been that kind of day.

I was on the streets of Bombay covering the communal riots in 1992, and the serial bomb blasts in 1993. I have seen a mob with swords chase a man and sever his arm from his body; I have seen rioters set an old man alight after garlanding him with car tyres; and I have faced the prospect of being burnt alive myself. For days I left home kissing my small child goodbye with thoughts of the worst. Those days return to haunt me sometimes even today.

But somehow I felt I understood what was happening then. I couldn't relate to it, but I understood the thirst for retaliation and revenge, the hatred and the frenzy that temporarily consumed ordinary people. I even wondered about a foreseeable future when I could sit down with some of the rioters and talk about what drove them to such madness.

 
 
That England shouldn't play the next two one-dayers should have been a no-brainer. Middlesex and Western Australia needn't have bothered making explanations. Sport is not bigger than life, not even in a country where it is said to be the religion
 

But this is simply beyond my comprehension. Every time I see the photograph of the young man - who looks not a lot older than my son - dressed in jeans and t-shirt, carrying a machine gun as casually as he does the satchel over his shoulder, bearing a sinister glee in his eyes, I am reminded of Barack Obama's words about the killers of 9/11: "My powers of empathy, my ability to reach into another's heart, cannot penetrate the blank stares of those who would murder innocents with such abstract, serene satisfaction."

Through the day, I haven't been able to cast aside the thought that to even discuss the impact of England's abandonment of a cricket tour, or the postponement of the Champions League, is a perversity in the face of such a gargantuan human calamity.

It was right for England's cricketers to go home. And it won't be wrong if they don't come back for the Test series. I would understand. Cricketers are heroes of a different kind. Putting their lives at risk is not in their line of duty. I was in London during the 2005 terrorist attacks and I went to Covent Garden for dinner from Lord's, and took to a tube back to the hotel. But that was a personal choice. I didn't feel unsafe. However, the images from Mumbai - the drawn-out drama, the cold-blooded audacity and sinisterness of it - are far more disturbing and macabre than those of a series of bombs going off.

This is not a time for brinksmanship, power games or counting cash. This is a time for quiet and respectful understanding. But life can't stand still. The city, the country, the world, must renew itself. Cricket is only a small part of it, but it will matter, it will make a difference.

Let me declare my interests. I love this city. If anything, the last two days have made me realise the depth of that love. I have no guns and grenades to defend it with, but I can fight for its spirit. It sounds like a cliché, but clichés also happen to be true. I can't wait to see a stadium in Bombay reverberating to the sounds of cricket. I will be there.

Sambit Bal is the editor of Cricinfo

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Posted by Beldarren on (November 30 2008, 18:33 PM GMT)

Very well written. I remember recently in the Border/Gavaskar Series commentators making the comment that Cricket in India was so much safer/different than Cricket in Pakistan..... Obvioulsy wrong, but this is not just a sad day for India, but a sad day for the world.

Posted by Muggle on (November 29 2008, 19:46 PM GMT)

Hi Sambit, It is in moments such as these that we realise the good fortune of having quality journalists bring sport to our desks around the world. I echo your voice, sentiment and view............though I could not string a few words together to say an apt sentence to sum up my views. You touched my heart with this one................. Keep going mate............ Anand Datla

Posted by Dogevpr2 on (November 29 2008, 15:00 PM GMT)

Everyone is entitled to their reaction to tragic events like this but what is the difference with the terrorist shooter at Virginia Tech, he was young too, or the Columbine Terrorists. We should not make it more evil because its in a "non-Western" setting.Life and sporting events went on in the US after 9/11. Cricket is one expression of the psyche of Indian people, it should go on.As for cricketers,English or otherwise not touring India, many probably won't and it's difficult to critiscise them for it but people did not stop visiting New York, and after the terrorists acts in London cricket or tourists did not stop visiting England.

Posted by prats_p on (November 29 2008, 14:24 PM GMT)

Good thought Sambit, Life is much much more larger than Cricket, I dont think people understood it when a cricketer leaves a tour to attend to his breaking marriage or attend to his ailing parents or to goes to be there when his child is born. Somehow we have to understand it just a game after all. Yes, I'm in Love with the game but it can wait, we have bigger issues here.It surely will be one of the methods in which we shall come out of this bad phase though. I live at Kolkata for now, My younger brother works at Mumbai, and I have left all work just to follow the news because this is one story which would not be forgotten in many decades to come. My heart goes out to all those who have been affected. Again If I was in Mumbai now, I would not hesitate to go to the stadium when the cricket happens, as would others do. Security of the players though should be the biggest priority when a tournament is scheduled.

Posted by Lateralis on (November 29 2008, 13:09 PM GMT)

With regard to fhmalik: All very heartwarming, but a rose tinted view on the subject. Where can starving children in sub saharan go to watch an engrossing cricket match? Where do you suppose their nearest TV is? Their nearest radio? They certainly can't all go and watch it live in a stadium (if they can afford to get in). So whilst I agree that cricket - and sport generally - may well be a welcome distraction from life's troubles for some, accessing live cricket is for some in the poorest regions of the world impossible, which puts the mockers on your arguements. Moreover, Alex Bannister once said: "Pressure? Pressure is having a Messerschmitt up your arse." That's real pressure. That's a real life and death situation. Cricket by comparrison is a trival pursuit and I really wish people - fans, national boards, media broadcasters - would remember that.

Posted by Haider78 on (November 29 2008, 11:54 AM GMT)

Mr. Sambit Bal it was really touching, I've stayed in Mumbai for 3-4 years and feel the same way you do. I felt soo sad to the core and just beg to ask these terrorists WHY?

Posted by Shankarcps on (November 29 2008, 11:03 AM GMT)

Touching article sir .In my life after the 9/11 attack this will be the most drastic attack .This will be called as india's 9/11.What the thing i cant control myself is our guests from various countries are taken as hostages and many of them killed.I pay my sorrow to all the families and friends who lost thier beloved ones in this attack.As far as cricket is concern it is just a game which is more than the lives as warne told in singapore.So the decision made by ECB is not wrong at this point of time.

Posted by bustermove on (November 29 2008, 08:24 AM GMT)

I am moved in a way I didn't expect.I am an avid reader of cricinfo opinion pieces and blogs and occasionally I get angry enough or passionate enough about something to post a comment myself.Sambit, you make my short term trivial responses seem even more trivial.This is quite simply the most beautiful and moving thing I've ever read on Cricinfo.Indeed it's hard to recall anything I've read anywhere in a long time that so moves me to rethink what is really important.It also puts in sharp relief the "so-called" importance of rabid discussions about "Monkeygate" and "what Katich said to Gambhir".I love cricket.I have loved it since I played every day after school.But there are too many (including some Cricinfo writers) who have used forums like Cricinfo to promote their own agendas, often in a manner which just increases the divides of country and religion.Cricket is supposed to be fun. Life is supposed to be precious.Thank-you for reminding us Sambit. My thoughts are with you and Mumbai.

Posted by PeteB on (November 29 2008, 07:07 AM GMT)

Deepest commiserations to all people affected by the barbaric actions of these terrorists. Cricket has survived well over 100 years and these events won't affect its future.

Posted by fhmalik on (November 29 2008, 06:02 AM GMT)

While these events are deeply saddening, i do not think cricket, or sport for that matter is a "trivial pursuit." Instead of posing cricket in opposition to issues such as hunger or aids we should view it as a palliative. When a poor or hungry or sick man watches an engrossing cricket match, he temporarily forgets his troubles and is transported to a world beyond them, where only the game matters, and he is able to "trivialize" the problems of his life, at least for a period. In that context i think it is more vital than ever for the games to go on. Just as the Taj must rise from the ashes to defy this madness, sport to must continue and not allow itself to be cowed by these people, and if more security is required than you should damned well provide as much as gets the job done. However if international teams continue to tour India but refuse to tour Pakistan than that will incontrovertibly expose their hypocricy vis-a-vis Pakistan and Pakistan cricket.

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Sambit Bal Editor Sambit Bal took to journalism at the age of 19 after realising that he wasn't fit for anything else, and to cricket journalism 14 years later when it dawned on him that it provided the perfect excuse to watch cricket in the office. Among other things he has bowled legspin, occasionally landing the ball in front of the batsman; laid out the comics page of a newspaper; covered crime, urban development and politics; and edited Gentleman, a monthly features magazine. He joined Wisden in 2001 and edited Wisden Asia Cricket and Cricinfo Magazine. He still spends his spare time watching cricket.

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